Divorce is stressful. A 2013 research by the Association for Psychological Science revealed it elevates the risk of depression for those already dealing with this mental condition. Another study also linked the separation to weight gain in men.
Although you might be able to run away from stress, you can reduce it and learn to take care of yourself a little better with these tips:
1. Get Expert Help
One way to lower your stress is to step back and let others handle the nitty-gritty for you. Hire a divorce lawyer who can represent you in court or walk you through the process.
If your ex-spouse is making it more difficult for you to continue with the divorce, you can hire process servers. These are people whose job is to look for your partner if they have been missing from the discussions and proceedings. They ensure they receive the summons and even the divorce papers.
Many counselors and therapists can provide psychological support not only for you but for your entire family, especially your children.
The bottom line is, you don’t need to go through this journey alone. Help is available, and many are waiting for you to holler.
2. Take Some Time to Grieve
Much of the stress comes from mourning and grieving. In the end, divorce can still feel like a loss or even the death of something dear. Take your time.
Experts say people go through different stages of grieving:
Note, though, that every person’s journey isn’t the same. Some don’t experience bargaining or depression. Others stay in the depression or anger stage for a long time. Many can set themselves timelines on the length of their grief and succeed with it.
However, you don’t need to beat yourself up if it lasts you longer than it should. Don’t be surprised too if you find yourself still feeling bouts of anger after you believe you’ve already accepted the situation.
3. Do One Thing for Yourself Every Day
You are more than the divorce or even the marriage, but it’s also reasonable and even valid for some to have a hard time pulling themselves out from this perception. What you can do is to one act of self-care each day to remind you of who you are and get in touch with your roots:
- Start decluttering the home. Perhaps it’s time to put away his or her belongings where you cannot see them.
- Listen to feel-good music. Skip the love songs for now and listen to dance tunes or classical songs instead.
- Spend as much time as you want to soak in the tub. Light those lavender or peppermint candles to help you relax further.
- Hire a babysitter at least once or twice a month so you can take a break and go out with your friends.
Divorce is a significant life decision and not the easiest thing to do, and the stress can be overwhelming. However, you have the power to control how it affects your life.